Out for this cycle (again)

Well I rented a nice hotel room and everything. Then I started to think about the fact that my BFF hadn't bothered to say if he went and got tested yet. So protecting myself I said well no lets not do it. Then I asked him if he had tested and he said yes I thought I told you. I have the paper work or whatever. So I said ok great then lets go ahead and go to the hotel tonight. He turns around and says no. :( It sucks bc my heart actually hurts. I did everything I was supposed to do this cycle. With each cycle my chances go down. So I will spend tonight in bed alone crying. Maybe next month. Maybe not. I really hurt inside right now.